Monday, May 16, 2011

Losing Sight...

This is one of those "observation moments" of those moments I look forward and back and say "Huh?!" We all have them, but rarely do we want to admit we have made a mistake somewhere in our lives, but when we do, I think it makes us realize that we are only human and most of us are creatures of habit.

My best friend, Jeff, and I have always had this habit of getting ourselves lost in the moment, we got into orchids and we were at the greenhouses every weekend buying every plant we thought was stunning—two or three years later, we would look at each other and say "What did I do and why didn't you stop me?!" We have had this habit ever since we started making money and realizing our love of learning about different things, we would buy books on the subjects of our obsession, we would buy the obsession and we would then stop and look back, it has always followed a cycle. Sometimes Jeff and I would be on the same obsession, sometimes not but it made our friendship the strong bond it is.

I have had birds since I was a child, I started like everyone else that gets into them, with a budgie and then moved up the species chart. Finally, I got to macaws and I truly love them more than any species or anything else in this world, I have learned so much from them and the bond between macaw and man/woman is so strong. I honestly believe of all the parrot species, macaws truly love to be our companions and if given the chance—they make the best companion animal anyone could ask for, next to dogs.

When I got into macaws, my original plan was to eventually get a Hyacinth, that had been my dream ever since seeing one when I was a child. My grandmother also loved them and we would always make it a point to see them at various places when we could. I liked the other species but the face of a Hy is just so incredibly perfect to me, those dark eyes that melt your heart, that comical face that makes you smile, and that rich blue color that takes your breathe away, and then to make it even more incredible, Mother Nature puts all that into this body that houses an incredible spirit and brain, she really outdid herself when she created Hys. gee, I got one macaw, Lucy, and then I thought well if one is good—two will be better, and if two is better—three will be awesome! Instead of staying focused, I was the kid in the candy store, I got a Ruby Macaw, a Greenwing, and then finally my smurf. I lost my sight and focus... You can say "well, you learned along the way until you got to that comfort zone of owning a Hy" but looking back, when I got into the macs, I should have gone straight for the smurf and now, I really wish I did. But, I do believe things happen for a reason, and I honestly believe in my heart that Miss Maggie was meant to be my companion Hy, we compliment each other and we have learned what makes the other happy.

I look at my life and I now am at the point where I want it simpler, I want a couple pets but I don't want a zoo, I want the objects of my passion and I want to focus on those, I am at a point where I know this is where I want to be and continue my education on those... I want to be focused on Hys and perhaps another species as my pets and learn as much as possible but I don't need to own them all. Eventually, perhaps I will want to breed Hys but for now, I want to enjoy the moments I have. I will always want to learn as much as I can about all parrots but as for my personal choices, Miss Maggie is my comfort zone. I want to live in a quiet town and I don't care if I make a ton of money, I want to be happy first and foremost and make enough money to live on and retire on. If I become wealthy—fine, but I have come to realize that life is more about love and happiness and not necessarily wealth. I truly enjoyed my youth and I learned a lot, but that learning process has brought me to where I am today.

I love my other two birds, I love Blaze and I adore Popeye, but I can honestly say I can see a day down the road that if the perfect home came along, I would let one go to that home, but at this time, I just don't know which one I would let go. I also feel at times I am shorting the other birds by not spending as much time with them as they would like and I also feel that Miss Maggie wants more of my attention and I am shorting her. I keep wondering what my life would be like if I was down to two birds and I think I would quite possibly enjoy it more, and not feel guilty about spending time with smurf.

As we get older, our bodies cheat us, they rob us of the energy we once had, they make us realize we're fighting the forces of aging and that we can't do everything we once could. We gain knowledge but we lose energy and it's just wrong—let us gain both so we can make more contributions to the world...

I am seeing so many good friends cutting back their flocks, our realities have been brought on by aging, the economy, our loved ones, etc. and we are beating ourselves up—we have come to the point where we realize something has to change in order for us to continue to be happy. Once we do make those changes, many of us are happier and seem to benefit quite well from doing what we really needed to do. We ran into the candy store and we lost our sight, we didn't need all that "sugar" we only needed something sweet and we ended up with a toothache in the process. I think we also need to realize, many of our birds will eventually see another home aside from ours, many of us got our birds as we got older and our birds lifespans are long enough that many could outlive us. I really believe that if you're not 100% happy with the choices you have made, make life easier while both you and the bird are young enough and flexible enough to make the transition easier for all involved.

The point I am trying to make is—remember your original focus, remember your original dream, and remember to stay true to those. We can alter course but don't be afraid of altering it several times along the way. I really believe we know very early in our lives what we are passionate about but we allow other influences to cloud that perception. We allow too many things alter our course and then we have to correct that and at times it can be quite difficult to do and at times heartbreaking. God, or whatever you believe in, gave you life and a course, follow it and you'll be happy.

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